distraught.. ah fuck the emotions la damn it
Sunday, December 26, 2004
Saturday, November 20, 2004
...when and where can I find my silver lining...
Ahh.. 2 more papers left till the end of the much feared A levels examinations.. However, I'm not in the least bit elated nor overjoyed about it.. Certainly, the process of studying was and is still revolting, yet the feeling of contentment guaranteed after the accomplishment of tasks and objectives required within the syllabus, is so very soothing and comforting.. I admit that the ideal freedom I ought to, and should own, is one which is limitless and insatiable. On the contrary, the freedom which had been allocated to me prior to the examinations, was seemingly minute and in fact, negligible. Instinctively, one would think that it should be reflected as immense torture, but this interim restricted freedom is inherent in the process of completing any phase of our lives and I had already submitted myself to it. Furthermore, what's ahead of me, the finite days of "impeccable freedom" between the concluding day of my JC life and the commencement of the next phase-- NS, is a verified type of freedom which would impinge on me. A month and probably a few more weeks, isn't what I deserve to have after much hardwork..
Oh well, what can I do.. Perhaps, the best solution is to tell myself that a month and a half is too long of an enjoyment period..
Delusion.. will it help?
Ahh.. 2 more papers left till the end of the much feared A levels examinations.. However, I'm not in the least bit elated nor overjoyed about it.. Certainly, the process of studying was and is still revolting, yet the feeling of contentment guaranteed after the accomplishment of tasks and objectives required within the syllabus, is so very soothing and comforting.. I admit that the ideal freedom I ought to, and should own, is one which is limitless and insatiable. On the contrary, the freedom which had been allocated to me prior to the examinations, was seemingly minute and in fact, negligible. Instinctively, one would think that it should be reflected as immense torture, but this interim restricted freedom is inherent in the process of completing any phase of our lives and I had already submitted myself to it. Furthermore, what's ahead of me, the finite days of "impeccable freedom" between the concluding day of my JC life and the commencement of the next phase-- NS, is a verified type of freedom which would impinge on me. A month and probably a few more weeks, isn't what I deserve to have after much hardwork..
Oh well, what can I do.. Perhaps, the best solution is to tell myself that a month and a half is too long of an enjoyment period..
Delusion.. will it help?
Wednesday, November 03, 2004
hah.. Look at this.. I woke up at 4 am, only to realise that there was a thick layer of smoke everywhere and visibility was low.. With breathing difficulties, we had to evacuate the building immediately via the stairways.. what an experience to have..
http://www.channelnewsasia.com/stories/singaporelocalnews/view/114858/1/.html
http://www.channelnewsasia.com/stories/singaporelocalnews/view/114858/1/.html
Wednesday, October 20, 2004
And yet, another sleepless night. I was bombarded by many thoughts and problems, all bound together by the canvas of a riot of emotions: depression,fear,stress,confusion,hatred and pity. These erupted from within me and spread across my sensory organs, seemingly close to a wildfire. This outburst inhibits my academic progress and indefinitely affects my social life. To ponder about life, is to question my existence here. If I had been created and nurtured to suffer setbacks, overcome challenges and face myriad ordeals, I would rather end it.
The assurance in life which I have always believed in, have been greatly impaired. This searing agony will stay, until the beacon of light rekindles and continues to shine on me just like before.
The assurance in life which I have always believed in, have been greatly impaired. This searing agony will stay, until the beacon of light rekindles and continues to shine on me just like before.
Sunday, October 17, 2004
Wednesday, October 13, 2004
Again, stress has caught up with me once more.. Hitting me haphazardly, from all directions; from different aspects, at every angle. Distraction is a major factor, though indirectly, it has caused precious time to be squandered away, be it knowingly or unknowingly. Getting tired of worrying and the feeling of insecurity. Avenues through which I can confide in are gradually dwindling in numbers. Life is meaningless.
It was never meant to be this way, I was wrong.
It was never meant to be this way, I was wrong.
Thursday, October 07, 2004
Recollections
As I leaned upon the wall that stood at a perfect right angle to the bed frame while resting on the bed, flashbacks of memories recurred in my mind. No, not those revolting experiences, but the heartening ones -- the ones which involved spending time with friends, and mingling with unfamiliar figures. Friends are indeed crucial in anyone's life, as they will determine your emotions at any instant, and leave a mark in your memories which will be etched in your heart until the age to come.
Thinking back, friends may also play a part in the kind of sports you like. The sport may in fact be a spirit dousing boring game but it's the interaction with your friends that makes you gain interest in the game.
Friends are also solutions to solitude and decisions in critical dilemmas.
Look how great the role of a friend is.. Be glad that you have them and most importantly, treasure them.
As I leaned upon the wall that stood at a perfect right angle to the bed frame while resting on the bed, flashbacks of memories recurred in my mind. No, not those revolting experiences, but the heartening ones -- the ones which involved spending time with friends, and mingling with unfamiliar figures. Friends are indeed crucial in anyone's life, as they will determine your emotions at any instant, and leave a mark in your memories which will be etched in your heart until the age to come.
Thinking back, friends may also play a part in the kind of sports you like. The sport may in fact be a spirit dousing boring game but it's the interaction with your friends that makes you gain interest in the game.
Friends are also solutions to solitude and decisions in critical dilemmas.
Look how great the role of a friend is.. Be glad that you have them and most importantly, treasure them.
Thursday, September 23, 2004
Don't Quit
When things go wrong as they sometimes will,
When the road you're trudging seems all uphill,
When the funds are low, and the debts are high,
And you want to smile, but you have to sigh,
When care is pressing you down a bit~
Rest if you must, but don't you quit.
Success is failure turned inside out,
The silver tint of the clouds of doubt,
And you never can tell how close you are,
It may be near when it seems afar.
So, stick to the fight when you're hardest hit~
It's when things go wrong that you mustn't quit.
When things go wrong as they sometimes will,
When the road you're trudging seems all uphill,
When the funds are low, and the debts are high,
And you want to smile, but you have to sigh,
When care is pressing you down a bit~
Rest if you must, but don't you quit.
Success is failure turned inside out,
The silver tint of the clouds of doubt,
And you never can tell how close you are,
It may be near when it seems afar.
So, stick to the fight when you're hardest hit~
It's when things go wrong that you mustn't quit.
Sunday, September 12, 2004
As the week of holidays comes to an end, I realised that I did go out everyday.. and most of the days were with my AC friends.. They really play a huge part in my life I must say.. they've given me motivation, encouragement and comfort when I most needed them.. I'm indeed contented with my circle of friends at present.. Thanks for the company and joy during this week of holidays.
Tuesday, September 07, 2004
Haven't been blogging for damn long because i'd been preoccupied with a myriad of activities.. My birthday on 4th of september was incredibly fun-filled.. not because of the rides at ESCAPE Theme Park.. but more of the accompaniment coupled with it. Had steamboat at Marina Bay after that, where they surprised me with a birthday cake from NYDC.. the coffee-mocha cake served as a perfect finale at the end of the meal.. Had to bring home the cake since most of us were too bloated to feed in more cake. A few of us wanted to catch a late night movie but were turned down by the low availability of vacant seats. Really enjoyed myself alot.. Was really my best birthday in all these years.. Thanks to all who were present to celebrate that special day with me.
The following day I went out with my secondary school classmates in the afternoon and ex-bandmates in the evening.. All in all I had 4 birthday cakes in my refrigerator including the cake bought by my parents..
Anyway this was the most prolonged birthday ever.. haha.. had 3 days of celebration.. Oh ya forgot to mention that I had already celebrated with my family on Friday.. yep..
I'm truly grateful to have this bunch of friends who had made my birthday the most enjoyable one.. Thanks alot.. Thanks for the cards and gifts too..
The following day I went out with my secondary school classmates in the afternoon and ex-bandmates in the evening.. All in all I had 4 birthday cakes in my refrigerator including the cake bought by my parents..
Anyway this was the most prolonged birthday ever.. haha.. had 3 days of celebration.. Oh ya forgot to mention that I had already celebrated with my family on Friday.. yep..
I'm truly grateful to have this bunch of friends who had made my birthday the most enjoyable one.. Thanks alot.. Thanks for the cards and gifts too..
Friday, September 03, 2004
watched 13 going on 30 today.. some fairy tale cliche.. anyway went to play table tennis at Ian's house with abt 11 J2s after that.. haha.. have been exercising like crazy.. went swimming, gymming, running and played table tennis from 4pm to 1030 pm yesterday.. almost skipped dinner.. damn worn out.
Tuesday, August 31, 2004
Sunday, August 29, 2004
Can't concentrate now.. there's this sudden urge to go out.. out of this enclosure of mine.. eagerly formed by the various piles of books and notes, and fed by words of knowledge and wisdom as part of the meal. I've had enough. The inadequate network of channels within the television's receiving circumference has sufficient grounds to allow me to voice out my indignation. The Olympics, is an all-favourite programme now, not because we want to marvel at the perfection of the gymnasts' stunts nor envy the incredible speed that the athletes are endowed with; but we are compelled to watch it.
Instead of replenishing my energy and concentration span while resting, the lack of leisure facilities brings about the adverse change, by further devouring them.
Instead of replenishing my energy and concentration span while resting, the lack of leisure facilities brings about the adverse change, by further devouring them.
Thursday, August 26, 2004
Friday, August 20, 2004
Really feel very sorry for myself. Can't seem to focus; my mind just wanders off everytime I try to study. Just feel like putting all the workload and stress aside, to reflect upon myself and to spend more time with my family and friends. Regretted sailing through the whole of J1 without much gain. Can't cope with my work anymore, seriously, after realising that there's so much to be done, yet there's so little time. Even though now I've understood most of the concepts for Physics, but I just don't have enough time to practise and even so, there's no one to guide me at home. I'm really fucked.
Retaining is probably the only solution, since to me, the merits earned by retaining outweigh that of the disadvantages. Come to think of it, it is true, yet untrue. In terms of climbing up the academic ladder, I'm all for it... Yet there are things which hold me back. One of which is having to change. My life will have to change, be it socially or mentally. You may say that having to change is part and parcel of life but that is something which I strongly resist. Having to bid farewell to my fellow budmates and welcoming a new world of hypocrites perhaps, and lots of uncertainty. Forging new bonds and having to change to adapt to their lifestyles ain't my cup of tea.
Secondly, I can't stand the school anymore. I really dread attending school. There are times when your emotions run like the roller coaster and times when you have to face situations which are not favourable and leaves you wondering what kind of a person you really are. I dare say that I've lost my identity ever since stepping into the college. Maybe I've made the wrong choice.. but to me, every decision I'd made, is unmistakably wrong.
In the preparation for the prelims, I've slogged real hard.. day and night, or should I say, day to night. However, somewhere within my heart tells me that I'm not up to it and I know it too. For this whole month and the past month, I studied like I never did before trying to comprehend concepts after concepts, theory after theory; but I feel that I've been wasting all my time, because I don't know what to study.. especially for physics.. I really need notes which summarise every single chapter such that I am confident of what i'm studying and the technique of resolving the questions.
So what if I've been studying hard? I find no time to relax and i'm forever pushing away outings with my friends. And the main point is that I still won't do well. It's not hard work that counts. It's the style of studying with the correct set of notes.
I really want to withdraw from school, but for now, I just need time to sort out my thoughts and live a stress free life. That's all I ask.
Retaining is probably the only solution, since to me, the merits earned by retaining outweigh that of the disadvantages. Come to think of it, it is true, yet untrue. In terms of climbing up the academic ladder, I'm all for it... Yet there are things which hold me back. One of which is having to change. My life will have to change, be it socially or mentally. You may say that having to change is part and parcel of life but that is something which I strongly resist. Having to bid farewell to my fellow budmates and welcoming a new world of hypocrites perhaps, and lots of uncertainty. Forging new bonds and having to change to adapt to their lifestyles ain't my cup of tea.
Secondly, I can't stand the school anymore. I really dread attending school. There are times when your emotions run like the roller coaster and times when you have to face situations which are not favourable and leaves you wondering what kind of a person you really are. I dare say that I've lost my identity ever since stepping into the college. Maybe I've made the wrong choice.. but to me, every decision I'd made, is unmistakably wrong.
In the preparation for the prelims, I've slogged real hard.. day and night, or should I say, day to night. However, somewhere within my heart tells me that I'm not up to it and I know it too. For this whole month and the past month, I studied like I never did before trying to comprehend concepts after concepts, theory after theory; but I feel that I've been wasting all my time, because I don't know what to study.. especially for physics.. I really need notes which summarise every single chapter such that I am confident of what i'm studying and the technique of resolving the questions.
So what if I've been studying hard? I find no time to relax and i'm forever pushing away outings with my friends. And the main point is that I still won't do well. It's not hard work that counts. It's the style of studying with the correct set of notes.
I really want to withdraw from school, but for now, I just need time to sort out my thoughts and live a stress free life. That's all I ask.
Saturday, August 14, 2004
Doubts about tomorrow..
Why bother looking forward to tomorrow when we do not know our fate then? We may just have a relapse of a terminal illness which no one, not even yourself, recognises that it exists within you. Or more likely, get run down by a vehicle while crossing the road to shop for some groceries. It is predestined. Only God has a say. Like one said, " a day lived, is a day earned/gained." We should be thankful for today, and not be hopeful for tomorrow..
The news had just reported about a heart complexity which leads to a sudden seizure and if it's not being resuscitated within 15 mins, you're a goner. And the unfathomable fact is that it isn't caused by the commonly used term, " clogged artery" which leads to a heart attack, but other factors(of which I do not know, I just know that it's called SCD or sth). It has already claimed many lives and on the average, 1 person will die from this illness everyday. Anyone aged between 18yrs and above can qualify.
Argh fuck it. Don't know why the sudden urge to write about such stuffs. Perhaps my time is near, cos' I've heard of this saying before: He who's dying, knows that he is.
Anyway just finished maths tuition at 12 am. Feel like a zombie now.
Why bother looking forward to tomorrow when we do not know our fate then? We may just have a relapse of a terminal illness which no one, not even yourself, recognises that it exists within you. Or more likely, get run down by a vehicle while crossing the road to shop for some groceries. It is predestined. Only God has a say. Like one said, " a day lived, is a day earned/gained." We should be thankful for today, and not be hopeful for tomorrow..
The news had just reported about a heart complexity which leads to a sudden seizure and if it's not being resuscitated within 15 mins, you're a goner. And the unfathomable fact is that it isn't caused by the commonly used term, " clogged artery" which leads to a heart attack, but other factors(of which I do not know, I just know that it's called SCD or sth). It has already claimed many lives and on the average, 1 person will die from this illness everyday. Anyone aged between 18yrs and above can qualify.
Argh fuck it. Don't know why the sudden urge to write about such stuffs. Perhaps my time is near, cos' I've heard of this saying before: He who's dying, knows that he is.
Anyway just finished maths tuition at 12 am. Feel like a zombie now.
Wednesday, August 11, 2004
A Night of Distress
The clamour which echoed along the hallway served as a drug, more like caffein, to keep him awake as if reminding him to start being bogged down by work. Certainly the noise which had "permeated" through the gaps left by incompetent carpentry, or more so, specially designed to ventilate the room, could be considered as being on par with that produced while ruling a piece of glass.
When he set his mind adrift subconsciously, he would be brought back to reality by an instantaneous deafening "bang", by the door; As he attempted to study, his eyes would be fixed on the sheet of paper filled with words, yet his heart and his mind had lost focus to somewhere else -- trying to predict when the blast would sound again by noting the climax of the squabble.
The mismatched timbres of voices soon ceased and he gladly cuddled into the what seemed impeccably woven quilt. However, his happiness was shortlived. As the door was gingerly opened, he knew the worst had come. His father had moved his nest into the room, and there, his eardrums suffered.
The clamour which echoed along the hallway served as a drug, more like caffein, to keep him awake as if reminding him to start being bogged down by work. Certainly the noise which had "permeated" through the gaps left by incompetent carpentry, or more so, specially designed to ventilate the room, could be considered as being on par with that produced while ruling a piece of glass.
When he set his mind adrift subconsciously, he would be brought back to reality by an instantaneous deafening "bang", by the door; As he attempted to study, his eyes would be fixed on the sheet of paper filled with words, yet his heart and his mind had lost focus to somewhere else -- trying to predict when the blast would sound again by noting the climax of the squabble.
The mismatched timbres of voices soon ceased and he gladly cuddled into the what seemed impeccably woven quilt. However, his happiness was shortlived. As the door was gingerly opened, he knew the worst had come. His father had moved his nest into the room, and there, his eardrums suffered.
Friday, July 30, 2004
My Thoughts..
Was supposed to go out with Jovan, Yina and a few of our friends to give him a belated birthday celebration. The plan was foiled by the Physics tuition today -- setting aside no time for this event. Feel rather bad. Shall postpone(not cancel) it. yep.
Anyway, have been quite busy recently. Firstly, due to the study plan i'd drawn out for the coming Prelims. Everyday, I'm packed with numerous chapters to cover, leaving no time for rest. Secondly, it's due to the number of punishment essays I had to complete, for not doing essay outlines and eventually skipped that GP lesson. On top of that, I have to attend to DCs next week on tues and wed.
Oh ya, speaking of the essays.. I have to thank Jillyan for taking time to help me write one of the essays; Daniel for helping me find model essays from the intranet; Guosheng for wanting to help; Cheryl and Yin ching for giving me ideas to write the essays; David for his die-hard spirit in helping me to fax his essay to Brandon and Ian so that they could scan and send it to me for copying; Brandon for attempting to receive the fax from David but failed; Ian for receiving the fax, scanning it and sending to me, and typed out the essay for me with modifications to David's essay.
Haha.. so many people to thank. Yea, but I'm truly grateful for all these friends for which without them I wouldn't have completed the essays within 1 day. To Jill: I still remember the treat k.
K la.. Decided to blog to stray away from the books for awhile. Tried to study for abt an hour but couldn't absorb. Just feeling damn tired. K continuing now. Bye.
Mood: Dying
Was supposed to go out with Jovan, Yina and a few of our friends to give him a belated birthday celebration. The plan was foiled by the Physics tuition today -- setting aside no time for this event. Feel rather bad. Shall postpone(not cancel) it. yep.
Anyway, have been quite busy recently. Firstly, due to the study plan i'd drawn out for the coming Prelims. Everyday, I'm packed with numerous chapters to cover, leaving no time for rest. Secondly, it's due to the number of punishment essays I had to complete, for not doing essay outlines and eventually skipped that GP lesson. On top of that, I have to attend to DCs next week on tues and wed.
Oh ya, speaking of the essays.. I have to thank Jillyan for taking time to help me write one of the essays; Daniel for helping me find model essays from the intranet; Guosheng for wanting to help; Cheryl and Yin ching for giving me ideas to write the essays; David for his die-hard spirit in helping me to fax his essay to Brandon and Ian so that they could scan and send it to me for copying; Brandon for attempting to receive the fax from David but failed; Ian for receiving the fax, scanning it and sending to me, and typed out the essay for me with modifications to David's essay.
Haha.. so many people to thank. Yea, but I'm truly grateful for all these friends for which without them I wouldn't have completed the essays within 1 day. To Jill: I still remember the treat k.
K la.. Decided to blog to stray away from the books for awhile. Tried to study for abt an hour but couldn't absorb. Just feeling damn tired. K continuing now. Bye.
Mood: Dying
Monday, July 26, 2004
The "aftermath"
I haven't been penning my thoughts down lately partly due to the adaptation I had to make from the transition between the Switzerland trip and reality.. On the day of my arrival back to Singapore, my feelings were simply numb; bidding farewell to the company I was with the past week was a simple feat and I thought that I was simply tired(due to the jet lag I suppose), so much so that I had tossed away all happy as well as unhappy thoughts, for the longing of seeing my bed.
When I woke up at 7pm in the evening(slept for 6 hours), I felt a tinge of sadness mixed with a sense of helplessness. With the impending exams, I knew I was in deep shit. There I sat on the familiarly comfortable "wheelie" chair, my eyes were fixed on an insignificant trinket owned by my brother and I began to reminisce about the various events that took place in Switzerland as well as its picturesque landscapes and landforms shaped up by the phenomena of nature. As I teared, I told myself that it was over. It's now back to fixed routines and busy schedules with tonnes of workload. Hey, I do know that most of you people out there had experienced or are still experiencing this "side-effects" of the trip, just to let you know that it is over and be brave about facing reality. Afterall, you are not alone in this.
Mood: Hungry
I haven't been penning my thoughts down lately partly due to the adaptation I had to make from the transition between the Switzerland trip and reality.. On the day of my arrival back to Singapore, my feelings were simply numb; bidding farewell to the company I was with the past week was a simple feat and I thought that I was simply tired(due to the jet lag I suppose), so much so that I had tossed away all happy as well as unhappy thoughts, for the longing of seeing my bed.
When I woke up at 7pm in the evening(slept for 6 hours), I felt a tinge of sadness mixed with a sense of helplessness. With the impending exams, I knew I was in deep shit. There I sat on the familiarly comfortable "wheelie" chair, my eyes were fixed on an insignificant trinket owned by my brother and I began to reminisce about the various events that took place in Switzerland as well as its picturesque landscapes and landforms shaped up by the phenomena of nature. As I teared, I told myself that it was over. It's now back to fixed routines and busy schedules with tonnes of workload. Hey, I do know that most of you people out there had experienced or are still experiencing this "side-effects" of the trip, just to let you know that it is over and be brave about facing reality. Afterall, you are not alone in this.
Mood: Hungry
Saturday, July 24, 2004
Wednesday, July 14, 2004
Depression
Swiss trip is over.. and I have no more mood for anything.. I'm like in a state of depression right now. Everything's gone. Nothing to look forward to. Everyday is just studying from now onwards, and I should achieve at least 3-4 topics of any subject a day in order to finish the syllabus on time for prelims. I don't know how i'm supposed to do that. Can't go out at all for 1 whole month. Can't even hold/attend a party since all my friends will be studying. I'm seriously very depressed. Don't know whether I should retain or not. Sigh.. Really miss all my friends at the trip. Can't even get together at all from now till end of prelims. Damn sad.
Mood: Depressed/Lost
Swiss trip is over.. and I have no more mood for anything.. I'm like in a state of depression right now. Everything's gone. Nothing to look forward to. Everyday is just studying from now onwards, and I should achieve at least 3-4 topics of any subject a day in order to finish the syllabus on time for prelims. I don't know how i'm supposed to do that. Can't go out at all for 1 whole month. Can't even hold/attend a party since all my friends will be studying. I'm seriously very depressed. Don't know whether I should retain or not. Sigh.. Really miss all my friends at the trip. Can't even get together at all from now till end of prelims. Damn sad.
Mood: Depressed/Lost
Wednesday, June 30, 2004
Death looms..
Recently, I've heard about a few tragedies that made me treasure life even more.. First was the demise of my uncle then was the news about a secondary sch girl, my junior in tkss, who had languished during 1 of the recent band practices and was diagnosed with brain tumour. She had her 1st operation today and the doctors are still deliberating as to whether the 2nd operation can be conducted due to the overgrown tumour.
2 days ago when I went to help out at my uncle's wake, I witnessed several incidents where my cousins(the 2 daughters of my uncle) actually put on a false upfront by holding back their tears and pretending to cast mild smiles on their faces when their friends came to visit them. However, after exchanging a few lines of conversation, they would be embraced by the warmth brought about by those who cared. Tears would then come trickling down their cheeks and unmask their true yet sincere emotions.
Then came a question which I had pondered over for quite sometime. I wondered if anyone would shed their tears for me when death has decided to withdraw my existence from the world. Perhaps I'm worthy of the tears of my parents... and my brother of course.. but I ain't sure about my friends.
Mood: Itchy
Recently, I've heard about a few tragedies that made me treasure life even more.. First was the demise of my uncle then was the news about a secondary sch girl, my junior in tkss, who had languished during 1 of the recent band practices and was diagnosed with brain tumour. She had her 1st operation today and the doctors are still deliberating as to whether the 2nd operation can be conducted due to the overgrown tumour.
2 days ago when I went to help out at my uncle's wake, I witnessed several incidents where my cousins(the 2 daughters of my uncle) actually put on a false upfront by holding back their tears and pretending to cast mild smiles on their faces when their friends came to visit them. However, after exchanging a few lines of conversation, they would be embraced by the warmth brought about by those who cared. Tears would then come trickling down their cheeks and unmask their true yet sincere emotions.
Then came a question which I had pondered over for quite sometime. I wondered if anyone would shed their tears for me when death has decided to withdraw my existence from the world. Perhaps I'm worthy of the tears of my parents... and my brother of course.. but I ain't sure about my friends.
Mood: Itchy
Friday, June 25, 2004
Behold, what's set before you..
Damn shagged now.. Just did Maths tutorial 38 and I'm almost done with it. Hate it. All the solutions require lengthy answers and once an error is being identified, you have to redo the whole bloody question. That's the problem about Maths.
Anyway, went out with Melvin, Ian, Joel and Daniel to study at Holland Village. We attempted, but our concentration spans were short-lived. Haha.. did a few questions of Maths tutorial 38 and most of the time we were making noise, patrolling the streets and patronising the shophouses.
Argh.. 2 more days of the holidays and school starts.. this sucks big time man. We go to school to learn, yet the more we learn, the more we forget; the more we forget, the less we know.. and eventually, we don't actually learn much.
Ya we know.. As one always say: A person with a higher level of education tend to possess a higher probability of getting a job of authoritative status and he, is the prototype of a successful life.
Though education may be a stepping stone to a more stable and respectable vocation, a latent precarious footing of the many stones is set in the midst where once not careful, one may plunge into the abyss readily created for failures.
Sad, you may say, yet nothing can be done to salvage what's already done. Hence the phrase, " no use crying over spilt milk". Though it may be hard to accept, it is the factual truth.
Uhh.. Life sux. School sux. Cheers.
Mood: Lethargic/Sick (of life that is)
Damn shagged now.. Just did Maths tutorial 38 and I'm almost done with it. Hate it. All the solutions require lengthy answers and once an error is being identified, you have to redo the whole bloody question. That's the problem about Maths.
Anyway, went out with Melvin, Ian, Joel and Daniel to study at Holland Village. We attempted, but our concentration spans were short-lived. Haha.. did a few questions of Maths tutorial 38 and most of the time we were making noise, patrolling the streets and patronising the shophouses.
Argh.. 2 more days of the holidays and school starts.. this sucks big time man. We go to school to learn, yet the more we learn, the more we forget; the more we forget, the less we know.. and eventually, we don't actually learn much.
Ya we know.. As one always say: A person with a higher level of education tend to possess a higher probability of getting a job of authoritative status and he, is the prototype of a successful life.
Though education may be a stepping stone to a more stable and respectable vocation, a latent precarious footing of the many stones is set in the midst where once not careful, one may plunge into the abyss readily created for failures.
Sad, you may say, yet nothing can be done to salvage what's already done. Hence the phrase, " no use crying over spilt milk". Though it may be hard to accept, it is the factual truth.
Uhh.. Life sux. School sux. Cheers.
Mood: Lethargic/Sick (of life that is)
Wednesday, June 23, 2004
The return of the haze..
The usual morning air rush had been conquered by what seemed like a familiar foreign odour. The haze had once again intruded the atmosphere of Singapore, and ever so gingerly, it permeated into the homes of the locals just like it did into mine. As I peered over the buildings from the 8th storey, my vision was greatly obscured by the remnance of burnt trees as the dust particles housed in it reflected all illumination from the fiery ball.
I was awakened by a relapse of migraine as the pain struck in spasms as well as by the effects of the choking mist. After which, I received a SMS from my Mum that encapsulated the death of my uncle, who had been diagnosed with liver cancer a month or so ago, just half an hour before I woke up.
Ahh.. what a fateful morning. Darn.
Mood: Lost/Blank
The usual morning air rush had been conquered by what seemed like a familiar foreign odour. The haze had once again intruded the atmosphere of Singapore, and ever so gingerly, it permeated into the homes of the locals just like it did into mine. As I peered over the buildings from the 8th storey, my vision was greatly obscured by the remnance of burnt trees as the dust particles housed in it reflected all illumination from the fiery ball.
I was awakened by a relapse of migraine as the pain struck in spasms as well as by the effects of the choking mist. After which, I received a SMS from my Mum that encapsulated the death of my uncle, who had been diagnosed with liver cancer a month or so ago, just half an hour before I woke up.
Ahh.. what a fateful morning. Darn.
Mood: Lost/Blank
Monday, June 21, 2004
Saturday, June 19, 2004
Spick 'n' Span
Yesterday was a rather uninteresting day. Was snapped out from my slumberland by the exuberant "goodness" of the fireball which hanged loosely in the vast blue sky. As if mimicking the stars in the dark, a spot of gleam, shooting radiant rays of light into the earth; causing me to feel a sense of uneasiness as the clash of cold and hot air landed upon my shell.
"Argh!", I snorted.
I then woke up, using much force to lift up the heavy eyelids. Rays of the sun struck my eyes similar to a raindrop hitting the surface of a window. The bed, an object depicting comfort, had gradually evolved into a revolting sun's nest.
The creaking of the stainless steel ladders double-glazed the layer of discomfort to a higher level. The renovators had arrived. Time to set my room free from my grasp.
Prior to the dismissal of the renovators, I sneaked a short nap on the fluffy sofa that sat in the living room. Lumps of grey wool which carried a few strands of hair decorated the tiled-floor.The room was infested with saw dust and dirt.
I groped around for the mouse hidden beneath the thin layers of newspapers and realised that my palm had turned to a dirty grey-black. This marked the beginning of my room-cleaning task. A wet towel was all I had to ensure the cleanliness of the table tops and the ornaments. This wasted like an hour of my life and a further hour for sweeping and mopping the floor, and shifting I even rearranged the computer system and tied the wires together.
A total of 3 hours, I had spent on tidying and cleaning up my room. "Spick and span" was all I aimed for and I could confidently announce that I had hit a bull's eye on my target.
Results of the renovation yesterday:
1)Installed a new television in my room
2)Working lights
3)Installed a noticeboard
4)Added more powerpoints
*Hope the blinds for the windows can be added as soon as possible so that I can sleep to my heart's content in the morning.
Mood: Bored
Yesterday was a rather uninteresting day. Was snapped out from my slumberland by the exuberant "goodness" of the fireball which hanged loosely in the vast blue sky. As if mimicking the stars in the dark, a spot of gleam, shooting radiant rays of light into the earth; causing me to feel a sense of uneasiness as the clash of cold and hot air landed upon my shell.
"Argh!", I snorted.
I then woke up, using much force to lift up the heavy eyelids. Rays of the sun struck my eyes similar to a raindrop hitting the surface of a window. The bed, an object depicting comfort, had gradually evolved into a revolting sun's nest.
The creaking of the stainless steel ladders double-glazed the layer of discomfort to a higher level. The renovators had arrived. Time to set my room free from my grasp.
Prior to the dismissal of the renovators, I sneaked a short nap on the fluffy sofa that sat in the living room. Lumps of grey wool which carried a few strands of hair decorated the tiled-floor.The room was infested with saw dust and dirt.
I groped around for the mouse hidden beneath the thin layers of newspapers and realised that my palm had turned to a dirty grey-black. This marked the beginning of my room-cleaning task. A wet towel was all I had to ensure the cleanliness of the table tops and the ornaments. This wasted like an hour of my life and a further hour for sweeping and mopping the floor, and shifting I even rearranged the computer system and tied the wires together.
A total of 3 hours, I had spent on tidying and cleaning up my room. "Spick and span" was all I aimed for and I could confidently announce that I had hit a bull's eye on my target.
Results of the renovation yesterday:
1)Installed a new television in my room
2)Working lights
3)Installed a noticeboard
4)Added more powerpoints
*Hope the blinds for the windows can be added as soon as possible so that I can sleep to my heart's content in the morning.
Mood: Bored
Thursday, June 17, 2004
Bungalow Infatuation..
Just returned from the bungalow chalet stay in SAFRA Changi today. It was 'helluva' fun.
First night, the barbeque sparked off the cheery ambience and the sole object of this barbeque was sort of attained -- to allow people from all walks of life within the congregation to gel and to engage in mutual spontaneous communication. "Myriad" choices of card games arose after the barbeque during the protracted "post-bbq period". Simultaneously, the cackling of the mahjong tiles could be heard as an undertone to the different pitches of voices from the masses, as well as the voices from the commentators and the supporting fans of EURO 2004.
These extended into the wee hours despite the drastic plunge in the figures of the bungalow population as the crowd gradually dwindled with time.
Finally, I was overly-burdened by the lethargy and knocked out at about five in the morning.
When I woke up, it was time for lunch. The hands of the clock had coincided at 12. Haha.. Can't believe that I managed to sleep a bloody 7 hours during a chalet.
The day continued with a swim at 3pm when a ball with bright rioting colours was involved in a game of monkey in the pool; being passed to and fro overhead, above Kevin in a parabolic manner.
Dinner time was worth mentioning as we feasted in succulent oriental cuisine in a Chinese restaurant where our skimpy casings of casual t-shirts and shorts coupled with a pair of sandals or slippers seemed improper. Ten dollars per person was the budget for the dinner and it encompassed the various taxes for the profit of the government as well as the restaurant. Soup, fish, Kai-lan, pork ribs, tofu, fu-yong egg with free flow of rice and chinese tea. These mouth-watering dishes were part of our 6-course dinner and this exquisite menu was exclusively designed by the manager himself for our contentment.
Ahh.. what an unforgettable experience..
Our last day was rather uneventful as we had to check out by 10am. Watched Shrek 2 at PS after that.
That's it.. I'm utterly worn out. Night.
Mood: Real tired
Just returned from the bungalow chalet stay in SAFRA Changi today. It was 'helluva' fun.
First night, the barbeque sparked off the cheery ambience and the sole object of this barbeque was sort of attained -- to allow people from all walks of life within the congregation to gel and to engage in mutual spontaneous communication. "Myriad" choices of card games arose after the barbeque during the protracted "post-bbq period". Simultaneously, the cackling of the mahjong tiles could be heard as an undertone to the different pitches of voices from the masses, as well as the voices from the commentators and the supporting fans of EURO 2004.
These extended into the wee hours despite the drastic plunge in the figures of the bungalow population as the crowd gradually dwindled with time.
Finally, I was overly-burdened by the lethargy and knocked out at about five in the morning.
When I woke up, it was time for lunch. The hands of the clock had coincided at 12. Haha.. Can't believe that I managed to sleep a bloody 7 hours during a chalet.
The day continued with a swim at 3pm when a ball with bright rioting colours was involved in a game of monkey in the pool; being passed to and fro overhead, above Kevin in a parabolic manner.
Dinner time was worth mentioning as we feasted in succulent oriental cuisine in a Chinese restaurant where our skimpy casings of casual t-shirts and shorts coupled with a pair of sandals or slippers seemed improper. Ten dollars per person was the budget for the dinner and it encompassed the various taxes for the profit of the government as well as the restaurant. Soup, fish, Kai-lan, pork ribs, tofu, fu-yong egg with free flow of rice and chinese tea. These mouth-watering dishes were part of our 6-course dinner and this exquisite menu was exclusively designed by the manager himself for our contentment.
Ahh.. what an unforgettable experience..
Our last day was rather uneventful as we had to check out by 10am. Watched Shrek 2 at PS after that.
That's it.. I'm utterly worn out. Night.
Mood: Real tired
Saturday, June 12, 2004
Finally..
Ahh.. finally get to use my own computer again.. haha.. although the renovation has not fully completed its task of giving my room a complete facelift, I decided to re-plug the wires for the computer as I really miss using it.
Oh yes, the concert is finally over.. It can be considered as a success since most of the people sitting in the audience were contented with the performance.
Added alot more photos in the photo gallery. Check it out.
Mood: Pleasant
Ahh.. finally get to use my own computer again.. haha.. although the renovation has not fully completed its task of giving my room a complete facelift, I decided to re-plug the wires for the computer as I really miss using it.
Oh yes, the concert is finally over.. It can be considered as a success since most of the people sitting in the audience were contented with the performance.
Added alot more photos in the photo gallery. Check it out.
Mood: Pleasant
Sunday, June 06, 2004
Sailing through time...
I haven't been blogging for a damn long period of time due to the relocation of my computer system. All these renovations have exclusively created a mundane and kinda "ston-ey" lifestyle for me. My computer as well as all the other furniture in the room, have been shifted out with all wires totally unplugged and detached from one another leaving a bare bleak room revealing silhouettes of the remaining walls caused by the radiant rays of light of dawn and dusk.
The resounding clamour produced by the clashes of voices echoed the room and pierced right through my ears engulfing my brain. The remnence of what's left are seemingly similar to the decapitated bodies in a warfront. It's utterly revolting to stay in the room as the chipped-off walls and the "debris" converted a room into a hideous looking slum.
That is why i'm staying over at my friend's house now. Yea.
Tired day. Tough shit.
Mood: Distracted
I haven't been blogging for a damn long period of time due to the relocation of my computer system. All these renovations have exclusively created a mundane and kinda "ston-ey" lifestyle for me. My computer as well as all the other furniture in the room, have been shifted out with all wires totally unplugged and detached from one another leaving a bare bleak room revealing silhouettes of the remaining walls caused by the radiant rays of light of dawn and dusk.
The resounding clamour produced by the clashes of voices echoed the room and pierced right through my ears engulfing my brain. The remnence of what's left are seemingly similar to the decapitated bodies in a warfront. It's utterly revolting to stay in the room as the chipped-off walls and the "debris" converted a room into a hideous looking slum.
That is why i'm staying over at my friend's house now. Yea.
Tired day. Tough shit.
Mood: Distracted
Monday, May 31, 2004
Friendships that bind..
Feel compelled to type this down.. about what happened today before watching the show..
5 of us were supposed to meet at 1pm to settle our lunch then catch the 150pm movie. And A reached incredibly early, at around 1230pm, so I told her to get the tickets first. Just about 15mins before the show,(only A and I were there, the rest were late) B called to announce that C was coming when actually C did not reply D's message the previous night to confirm his presence today.
Alrite, to sum it up.. C was the 6th person for today's movie and it was unexpected. So, A and I went to queue up for his ticket praying that there will be seats available such that all of us can sit together. Our hopes were not only dashed but the closest seat to us, was on the other end of the theatre.
Here's the highlight:
Upon arrival,B thought of a "novel idea" and volunteered to take the "solitude" seat without any procrastination even though his primary objective of coming out is to watch a movie with us and to go home thereafter.
"What a great friend" I thought. Although I was thinking of taking the seat of despair, I deliberated and didn't come to a firm decision. Later, B and C sat one infront of the other elsewhere in the theatre with the rest of us sitting together. The motive of B being such that C will not be ostracised and forced to sit alone.
Although this may be a rather insignificant event that can be overlooked and simply forgotten, I find such friendships worth having and I do revere him as a true friend; for the fact of voicing out his immediate solution which stood on the losing end and executing it without any hesitation.
Indeed, I'm enlightened. I really am.
Mood: Extremely awake
Feel compelled to type this down.. about what happened today before watching the show..
5 of us were supposed to meet at 1pm to settle our lunch then catch the 150pm movie. And A reached incredibly early, at around 1230pm, so I told her to get the tickets first. Just about 15mins before the show,(only A and I were there, the rest were late) B called to announce that C was coming when actually C did not reply D's message the previous night to confirm his presence today.
Alrite, to sum it up.. C was the 6th person for today's movie and it was unexpected. So, A and I went to queue up for his ticket praying that there will be seats available such that all of us can sit together. Our hopes were not only dashed but the closest seat to us, was on the other end of the theatre.
Here's the highlight:
Upon arrival,B thought of a "novel idea" and volunteered to take the "solitude" seat without any procrastination even though his primary objective of coming out is to watch a movie with us and to go home thereafter.
"What a great friend" I thought. Although I was thinking of taking the seat of despair, I deliberated and didn't come to a firm decision. Later, B and C sat one infront of the other elsewhere in the theatre with the rest of us sitting together. The motive of B being such that C will not be ostracised and forced to sit alone.
Although this may be a rather insignificant event that can be overlooked and simply forgotten, I find such friendships worth having and I do revere him as a true friend; for the fact of voicing out his immediate solution which stood on the losing end and executing it without any hesitation.
Indeed, I'm enlightened. I really am.
Mood: Extremely awake
Sunday, May 30, 2004
Slimming formula?
Alrite.. I'm gonna watch " The day after tomorrow" with some friends later at 150pm at PS. Hope the show will be intriguing enough and not predictable for our pleasure.
Oh yes.. Just weighed myself using the digital weighing scale I have at home, and guess what, I lost 3kg this week.. so i'm 54kg now. Perhaps it's due to the various sickness I had or maybe the exercise I did throughout the week-- basketball and swimming. Not sure.. anyway, my dry cough seems to have worsened even though I tried to abstain from cold drinks and ice-cream yesterday. O.. I just remembered.. the water that I drank yesterday after the basketball game from the water cooler was cold. Ahh.. that explains why. Ok.. gotta take my medicine now and prepare to leave. cya.
Mood: Sickly
Alrite.. I'm gonna watch " The day after tomorrow" with some friends later at 150pm at PS. Hope the show will be intriguing enough and not predictable for our pleasure.
Oh yes.. Just weighed myself using the digital weighing scale I have at home, and guess what, I lost 3kg this week.. so i'm 54kg now. Perhaps it's due to the various sickness I had or maybe the exercise I did throughout the week-- basketball and swimming. Not sure.. anyway, my dry cough seems to have worsened even though I tried to abstain from cold drinks and ice-cream yesterday. O.. I just remembered.. the water that I drank yesterday after the basketball game from the water cooler was cold. Ahh.. that explains why. Ok.. gotta take my medicine now and prepare to leave. cya.
Mood: Sickly
Saturday, May 29, 2004
Joke
Came across this joke in my fren's email which she had sent to me.. thought that it is qt funny so I decided to share it wirh all of you to lighten your spirit for the day..
A couple of New Jersey hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn't seem to be breathing,his
eyes are rolled back in his head. The other guy whips out his cell
phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: "My
friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator, in a calm soothing voice
says: "Just take it easy. I can help. First, let's make sure he's
dead." There is a silence, then a shot is heard. The guy's voice comes
back on the line. He says: "OK, now what?"
Came across this joke in my fren's email which she had sent to me.. thought that it is qt funny so I decided to share it wirh all of you to lighten your spirit for the day..
A couple of New Jersey hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn't seem to be breathing,his
eyes are rolled back in his head. The other guy whips out his cell
phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: "My
friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator, in a calm soothing voice
says: "Just take it easy. I can help. First, let's make sure he's
dead." There is a silence, then a shot is heard. The guy's voice comes
back on the line. He says: "OK, now what?"
Today
Today is yet another ordinary saturday with a basketball game to play in the evening as usual. A game where i've learnt that David and Guosheng's statuses of being pros in this sport had never dwindle and they're still as fast as the speed of light.. or at least somewhere close..
Argh.. turned down a request from a few secondary school friends to watch "Shrek 2" just because of this basketball game.. Perhaps another reason would be that the travelling time had doused my previously jubilee spirit about watching that movie with them. Feeling a little bad about it now, anyway I told them about it beforehand and they were somewhat agreeable, I would say.
There's Mathematics tuition tomorrow at around 430pm.. hope I can catch a movie with the tuition group members before or after the tuition. Maybe "The day after tomorrow"? Since many of my friends claimed that it was worth watching.
Oh ya.. despite the dry cough and the slight flu I had today, I insisted on joining the basketball game because I knew it would be worthwhile.
Mood: stone-y
Today is yet another ordinary saturday with a basketball game to play in the evening as usual. A game where i've learnt that David and Guosheng's statuses of being pros in this sport had never dwindle and they're still as fast as the speed of light.. or at least somewhere close..
Argh.. turned down a request from a few secondary school friends to watch "Shrek 2" just because of this basketball game.. Perhaps another reason would be that the travelling time had doused my previously jubilee spirit about watching that movie with them. Feeling a little bad about it now, anyway I told them about it beforehand and they were somewhat agreeable, I would say.
There's Mathematics tuition tomorrow at around 430pm.. hope I can catch a movie with the tuition group members before or after the tuition. Maybe "The day after tomorrow"? Since many of my friends claimed that it was worth watching.
Oh ya.. despite the dry cough and the slight flu I had today, I insisted on joining the basketball game because I knew it would be worthwhile.
Mood: stone-y
Friday, May 28, 2004
IQ test
Haha.. damn bored.. so decided to try out this IQ test which appeared as a popup during the transition between webpages.
Try thisIQ Test
The True IQ Test
Congratulations, Roy!
Your IQ score is 126
This number is based on a scientific formula that compares how many questions you answered correctly on the True IQ Test relative to others.
Your Intellectual Type is Visual Mathematician. This means you are gifted at spotting patterns — both in pictures and in numbers. These talents combined with your overall high intelligence make you good at understanding the big picture, which is why people trust your instincts and turn to you for direction — especially in the workplace. And that's just some of what we know about you from your test results.
Haha.. damn bored.. so decided to try out this IQ test which appeared as a popup during the transition between webpages.
Try this
The True IQ Test
Congratulations, Roy!
Your IQ score is 126
This number is based on a scientific formula that compares how many questions you answered correctly on the True IQ Test relative to others.
Your Intellectual Type is Visual Mathematician. This means you are gifted at spotting patterns — both in pictures and in numbers. These talents combined with your overall high intelligence make you good at understanding the big picture, which is why people trust your instincts and turn to you for direction — especially in the workplace. And that's just some of what we know about you from your test results.
*cough*
Have been very sickly lately..didn't go to school on Mon,Wed and today. Skipped school on Monday because of the medical appointment I had and as for Wed, I had this burnt sensation in my throat and it was damn painful. Then today, my sore throat hasnt recovered and in addition to that, I caught a flu bug and it came with a slight headache and dry cough. Argh.. feelin damn terrible now.. Gonna rest now.. cya
Mood: Sickly
Have been very sickly lately..didn't go to school on Mon,Wed and today. Skipped school on Monday because of the medical appointment I had and as for Wed, I had this burnt sensation in my throat and it was damn painful. Then today, my sore throat hasnt recovered and in addition to that, I caught a flu bug and it came with a slight headache and dry cough. Argh.. feelin damn terrible now.. Gonna rest now.. cya
Mood: Sickly
Monday, May 24, 2004
Sunday, May 23, 2004
Leaped,Landed and.. "Crack!"-- part 2
The title says it all... Yep.. just sprained my ankle again yesterday during basketball, and it was similar to the way I had sprained my left ankle the previous time. However, for this time, it was the right ankle that had suffered the injury and it was much more severe. Apart from the excruciating pain at the joint connecting the foot and the upper part of the leg, the extent of the foot movement was restricted. Slipped off Jianxiang's foot when I had achieved stability upon reaching the ground.
Anyway, I went to swim today despite having a sprained right ankle. Had to submit to swimming breaststroke to minimise the strain on the injury. Yea.. after that went to watch "50 First Dates" with Janice, Ian and Jeremy. Haha.. the show was entertaining overall due to its comical scenes but had a tinge of sadness simultaneously.
Ah.. that's all I can write... I guess. Cya..
Mood: Tired/Bored
The title says it all... Yep.. just sprained my ankle again yesterday during basketball, and it was similar to the way I had sprained my left ankle the previous time. However, for this time, it was the right ankle that had suffered the injury and it was much more severe. Apart from the excruciating pain at the joint connecting the foot and the upper part of the leg, the extent of the foot movement was restricted. Slipped off Jianxiang's foot when I had achieved stability upon reaching the ground.
Anyway, I went to swim today despite having a sprained right ankle. Had to submit to swimming breaststroke to minimise the strain on the injury. Yea.. after that went to watch "50 First Dates" with Janice, Ian and Jeremy. Haha.. the show was entertaining overall due to its comical scenes but had a tinge of sadness simultaneously.
Ah.. that's all I can write... I guess. Cya..
Mood: Tired/Bored
Friday, May 21, 2004
Tests and more tests..
Just went to see the respiratory specialist referred to by my GP. Argh.. the effective waiting time for the doctors was about 2 hours, and I have to come back on 2 other days for many tests. On this coming Mon, I'm required to be present for an exercise test and on 4th June, an X-ray and a pulmonary respiratory test. Oh.. just realised that I haven't told you the reason for these multiple tests.
Last month, I realised that I wheezed alot while running short distances and had to stop to catch my breath before continue running. In addition to that, I pant very easily so much so that even climbing a few flights of stairs will make me breathless. I then paid the doctor a visit, he suspected that I had exercise-induced asthma -- a condition where the windpipe constricts when exercising causing the wheezing sound. Yea.. resulting in having all these tests. Meanwhile, I have to use an inhaler(Ventolin) at least half an hour before running or exercising to prevent the constriction of my windpipe.
Oh ya.. the doctor also said that if the tests show that I have exercise-induced asthma, I will be downgraded to a clerk in NS.. haha.. that's damn slack..
Mood: Sluggish
Just went to see the respiratory specialist referred to by my GP. Argh.. the effective waiting time for the doctors was about 2 hours, and I have to come back on 2 other days for many tests. On this coming Mon, I'm required to be present for an exercise test and on 4th June, an X-ray and a pulmonary respiratory test. Oh.. just realised that I haven't told you the reason for these multiple tests.
Last month, I realised that I wheezed alot while running short distances and had to stop to catch my breath before continue running. In addition to that, I pant very easily so much so that even climbing a few flights of stairs will make me breathless. I then paid the doctor a visit, he suspected that I had exercise-induced asthma -- a condition where the windpipe constricts when exercising causing the wheezing sound. Yea.. resulting in having all these tests. Meanwhile, I have to use an inhaler(Ventolin) at least half an hour before running or exercising to prevent the constriction of my windpipe.
Oh ya.. the doctor also said that if the tests show that I have exercise-induced asthma, I will be downgraded to a clerk in NS.. haha.. that's damn slack..
Mood: Sluggish
Monday, May 17, 2004
Drained..
The weather this week has been unbearably humid. Outdoors, I could feel the painful streaks of the fireball devouring my flesh.
Came back from school today at about 3pm then headed to the POSB branch at centrepoint for an ATM card replacement. As to why I needed to replace the card, I will type it in my next entry. After which, I made my way down to PS for a haircut.
Thats all. Too tired. Good night.
Mood:Tired
The weather this week has been unbearably humid. Outdoors, I could feel the painful streaks of the fireball devouring my flesh.
Came back from school today at about 3pm then headed to the POSB branch at centrepoint for an ATM card replacement. As to why I needed to replace the card, I will type it in my next entry. After which, I made my way down to PS for a haircut.
Thats all. Too tired. Good night.
Mood:Tired
Saturday, May 15, 2004
Recollections..
Just had a belated Mother's Day dinner for my grandma. The moment I set foot into the restaurant, I walked instinctively towards her; only to realise that I had nothing to say even though I wanted to converse with her. Abruptly, I could sense the gap between us(not the generation gap though)and felt that I was distanced away from her.
Fragments of memories suddenly flashed in my mind-- memories of the past.. just before the departure of my Granddad.
Ugh.. very sleepy.. Shall continue the next time. Anyway just uploaded more photos in the photo gallery.
Mood: Shagged
Just had a belated Mother's Day dinner for my grandma. The moment I set foot into the restaurant, I walked instinctively towards her; only to realise that I had nothing to say even though I wanted to converse with her. Abruptly, I could sense the gap between us(not the generation gap though)and felt that I was distanced away from her.
Fragments of memories suddenly flashed in my mind-- memories of the past.. just before the departure of my Granddad.
Ugh.. very sleepy.. Shall continue the next time. Anyway just uploaded more photos in the photo gallery.
Mood: Shagged
Friday, May 14, 2004
Leaped,Landed and.. "Crack!"
Fuckin sprained my ankle today during PE lesson. We played basketball through recess and then misfortune struck. Of all stances, my friend had to undertake one which had her foot set in a vertical plane with mine when I leaped and targeted for the net. It was without doubt that I would fall perpetually right on target and that was how I obtained a bandaged foot. Ahh.. forgive and forget. No hard feelings.
Yea.. that was about it. Bernard got me a bag of ice and I signed out from school.
Mood: Confused/Restless
Fuckin sprained my ankle today during PE lesson. We played basketball through recess and then misfortune struck. Of all stances, my friend had to undertake one which had her foot set in a vertical plane with mine when I leaped and targeted for the net. It was without doubt that I would fall perpetually right on target and that was how I obtained a bandaged foot. Ahh.. forgive and forget. No hard feelings.
Yea.. that was about it. Bernard got me a bag of ice and I signed out from school.
Mood: Confused/Restless
Sweet "Victory"
Mmm.. The sweet taste of "victory"..the victory over the battle of tiresome preparations for exams. It has finally come to an interim halt. Chemistry today was quite alrite, it was rather manageable. Yea.. went out with some of my classmates after the paper for lunch and a movie. Had lunch at Cineleisure's Pasta Mania after wandering aimlessly for a period of time. Bernard was crappier than usual and Justin was more jovial;Anyway everyone seemed very talkative today, the clamour over lunch caused by the interference of the different voices was maybe a "post-exam syndrome."
Hah. Look what studying has done to us. K, never mind about that.. Van Helsing was better than expected and definitely tonnes better than "Underworld" although their plots somehow coincide. Justin's Mum had 4 free cathay movie vouchers which expires today, so our first movie was totally f.o.c! Haha.. and yes.. that sparked the thought of a "mini-movie marathon." Bernard suggested for a second movie, "Troy" after the first, and it lasted till 8pm. Shiok man. 2 rather long movies in a day. What more can i ask for, on the final day of exams?
Mood: Lethargic/Sleepy/Groggy
Mmm.. The sweet taste of "victory"..the victory over the battle of tiresome preparations for exams. It has finally come to an interim halt. Chemistry today was quite alrite, it was rather manageable. Yea.. went out with some of my classmates after the paper for lunch and a movie. Had lunch at Cineleisure's Pasta Mania after wandering aimlessly for a period of time. Bernard was crappier than usual and Justin was more jovial;Anyway everyone seemed very talkative today, the clamour over lunch caused by the interference of the different voices was maybe a "post-exam syndrome."
Hah. Look what studying has done to us. K, never mind about that.. Van Helsing was better than expected and definitely tonnes better than "Underworld" although their plots somehow coincide. Justin's Mum had 4 free cathay movie vouchers which expires today, so our first movie was totally f.o.c! Haha.. and yes.. that sparked the thought of a "mini-movie marathon." Bernard suggested for a second movie, "Troy" after the first, and it lasted till 8pm. Shiok man. 2 rather long movies in a day. What more can i ask for, on the final day of exams?
Mood: Lethargic/Sleepy/Groggy
Monday, May 10, 2004
Finale -- End Of Revision
After a day of revision, I still feel extremely unprepared for tomorrow's paper. Dunno why. Maybe because i have been slacking alot recently.. uh.. who cares. I just wanna get it over and done with and look forward to many things coming up ahead after terms. My Dad just showed me the supposed layout of my room after renovation in early June. Yeah.. Everything will be changed, including my bed frame. Hah.. can't wait. Ok.. I shall go and bathe now, feeling damn sticky.
Mood: -
After a day of revision, I still feel extremely unprepared for tomorrow's paper. Dunno why. Maybe because i have been slacking alot recently.. uh.. who cares. I just wanna get it over and done with and look forward to many things coming up ahead after terms. My Dad just showed me the supposed layout of my room after renovation in early June. Yeah.. Everything will be changed, including my bed frame. Hah.. can't wait. Ok.. I shall go and bathe now, feeling damn sticky.
Mood: -
Ahh.. Rest..
Argh.. Just finished revision for Complex Numbers and Differential Equation, 2 more irritating topics to go -- Permutation and Combination, Probability. These 2 topics have always been my worst 2 topics in the Mathematics syllabus so far. Haha.. I skipped the whole question involving these 2 topics during O levels, didn't even bother to ponder about it.
Ah.. It's my rest period now.. Should last till about 5pm before I continue mugging for tomorrow's Maths paper. Yep.. All the best to everyone taking the Maths paper tomorrow!
Mood: Relaxed, accompanied by a tinge of stress
Argh.. Just finished revision for Complex Numbers and Differential Equation, 2 more irritating topics to go -- Permutation and Combination, Probability. These 2 topics have always been my worst 2 topics in the Mathematics syllabus so far. Haha.. I skipped the whole question involving these 2 topics during O levels, didn't even bother to ponder about it.
Ah.. It's my rest period now.. Should last till about 5pm before I continue mugging for tomorrow's Maths paper. Yep.. All the best to everyone taking the Maths paper tomorrow!
Mood: Relaxed, accompanied by a tinge of stress
Sunday, May 09, 2004
Slacker is my middle name
Just been through another uneventful day. Nothing much. The only thing that was etched in my memory today was about this funeral procession thing down the road just adjacent to Gan Eng Seng secondary. You must be wondering why that particular event was so significant to me.
Alright, after witnessing the "road-march" behind the coffin, recollections of the death of my late Grandfather flashed right upon my conscious mind. It was as if reliving the 3-day wake again. Even though I was, and still am a Christian, i was compelled to follow the Buddhist rituals during the wake of my Grandpa because my Grandmother was an extremely devotee in the Buddhist religion so much so that she had converted her HDB home into a temple-like altar. I did experience the "road-march" and we had to walk barefooted on the roads in boring white tops and dark bottoms. I can still remember the atmosphere that was created then; silent, yet the only sounds heard were cries of regret and mourns of remorse. Everything else that had occurred simultaneously were seemingly halted, at that moment of time, just for the funeral procession to take place.
So much for the funeral, it's Mother's Day today! However, I only had a simple lunch with my Mum at Swensen's(PS). Although I didn't feast on anything there, my purpose was met -- to accompany my Mum on Mother's Day. My presence there was a little insignificant as I didn't chat much with my Mum and Brother.Yep.. I went home by myself later cause I was tired and was supposed to study but i didn't. Hah. Screw terms.
Mood: Feverish/Shagged
Just been through another uneventful day. Nothing much. The only thing that was etched in my memory today was about this funeral procession thing down the road just adjacent to Gan Eng Seng secondary. You must be wondering why that particular event was so significant to me.
Alright, after witnessing the "road-march" behind the coffin, recollections of the death of my late Grandfather flashed right upon my conscious mind. It was as if reliving the 3-day wake again. Even though I was, and still am a Christian, i was compelled to follow the Buddhist rituals during the wake of my Grandpa because my Grandmother was an extremely devotee in the Buddhist religion so much so that she had converted her HDB home into a temple-like altar. I did experience the "road-march" and we had to walk barefooted on the roads in boring white tops and dark bottoms. I can still remember the atmosphere that was created then; silent, yet the only sounds heard were cries of regret and mourns of remorse. Everything else that had occurred simultaneously were seemingly halted, at that moment of time, just for the funeral procession to take place.
So much for the funeral, it's Mother's Day today! However, I only had a simple lunch with my Mum at Swensen's(PS). Although I didn't feast on anything there, my purpose was met -- to accompany my Mum on Mother's Day. My presence there was a little insignificant as I didn't chat much with my Mum and Brother.Yep.. I went home by myself later cause I was tired and was supposed to study but i didn't. Hah. Screw terms.
Mood: Feverish/Shagged
Saturday, May 08, 2004
Ambitious?
Hey, today wasn't as fruitful as other study days, or rather, yesterday. I was tellingly distracted. I went over to my friend's place at dawn. Played truant today for the sole objective of mugging, but i was somehow convinced by him to submit myself to "duet-studying". I didn't know what incentives were entailed in the deal, but managed to agree to it without much procrastination. Upon entering his room, I was exposed to the infamous morning bedroom scene--blankets, bolsters and pillows were strewn all over the bed and onto the floor. I then instinctively pushed the pillows aside and settled the bed for a study desk. After reading through a section of the "Food Chemistry" section, we went downstairs for breakfast. Due to several breaks, I managed to finish that particular chapter only at around 3 pm. Apart from the regular self-rewarded breaks, the tintinabulation from a construction site in the vicinity too disrupted my spontaneous studying cycle. Scheduled to study a chapter of Chemistry and 2 chapters of physics but at the end of the day, I had only accomplished the "Food Chem" chapter and a skimpy style of revision for the past few Chem topics. Was I being ambitious? Perhaps... Perhaps not.
Mood: Stressed/Confused
Hey, today wasn't as fruitful as other study days, or rather, yesterday. I was tellingly distracted. I went over to my friend's place at dawn. Played truant today for the sole objective of mugging, but i was somehow convinced by him to submit myself to "duet-studying". I didn't know what incentives were entailed in the deal, but managed to agree to it without much procrastination. Upon entering his room, I was exposed to the infamous morning bedroom scene--blankets, bolsters and pillows were strewn all over the bed and onto the floor. I then instinctively pushed the pillows aside and settled the bed for a study desk. After reading through a section of the "Food Chemistry" section, we went downstairs for breakfast. Due to several breaks, I managed to finish that particular chapter only at around 3 pm. Apart from the regular self-rewarded breaks, the tintinabulation from a construction site in the vicinity too disrupted my spontaneous studying cycle. Scheduled to study a chapter of Chemistry and 2 chapters of physics but at the end of the day, I had only accomplished the "Food Chem" chapter and a skimpy style of revision for the past few Chem topics. Was I being ambitious? Perhaps... Perhaps not.
Mood: Stressed/Confused
Wednesday, May 05, 2004
Unaccountable Mood Plunge...
Today is yet another ordinary schooling Wednesday, still unable to overcome the lethargy within me. Set on my journey to school at a far later time than yesterday as I went to bed at around 1240am the night before. Was busy doin the Maths TYS in preparation for the coming Term Exams next week.
Lessons were mundane as usual with an exception of the GP lesson. We had the opportunity to watch a video on child pornography documented with an illegal organisation called "Wonderland Club" as the focus of the orbit of information. It was totally sick and inhuman. The members of the "Wonderland Club" were paedophiles from all over the world and they did nothing but plainly exchanging photos of abused children both physically and sexually. Yeap.. and it lasted for an estimated duration of an hour after which we had open discussions about the video. Haha.. and some of the remarks were rather comical. Alright, shall not dwell further into it.
After school, i was supposed to meet cheryl, janice, christopher and melvin before going for Maths tuition at 330pm. Cheryl and Chris came to meet me first, then we settled at the void deck for lunch while waiting for melvin and janice to come. Everyone was silent and i could feel a mild essence of sadness and impatience building up within me. Wonder what had caused such feelings to grow within me at that juncture. Cheryl was rather moody judged by her facial expressions and sealed lips. That was a rare event as she was usually bubbly and vocal. Later, Chris chanted out words that said "I don't feel like goin for tuition." The reason he gave was that he had a GP essay and lots of Chem homework to complete. This further aggravated my impatience and sense of emptiness. Janice soon came from her Econs consultation and we had lunch. The time we waited for melvin to come was seemingly the most protracted 30-40 mins in my entire life. Melvin was notorious for his busy schedule as he is the president of the Geog Society. An impromptu meeting like this, did not astound us.
After tuition, I hailed for a cab with the intention of reaching home as fast as i could, so that i could start studying at 830pm. In the cab, the driver chatted with me as if I had known him for a long time. He practically told me his life story of how he became from an average income working person to a mere pauper where he had to wear the same clothes for about 3-4 years. It was a rather touching life experience and only then, did i realise that I was very fortunate to have a worry-free life in terms of expenses. I paid him 9 dollars before i dropped off at my apartment block. I really revere him for being able to slog seven days a week to support his family,and by just living on a basic salary of $2000.
Alright, time to study. Cya..
Mood: Sleepy
Today is yet another ordinary schooling Wednesday, still unable to overcome the lethargy within me. Set on my journey to school at a far later time than yesterday as I went to bed at around 1240am the night before. Was busy doin the Maths TYS in preparation for the coming Term Exams next week.
Lessons were mundane as usual with an exception of the GP lesson. We had the opportunity to watch a video on child pornography documented with an illegal organisation called "Wonderland Club" as the focus of the orbit of information. It was totally sick and inhuman. The members of the "Wonderland Club" were paedophiles from all over the world and they did nothing but plainly exchanging photos of abused children both physically and sexually. Yeap.. and it lasted for an estimated duration of an hour after which we had open discussions about the video. Haha.. and some of the remarks were rather comical. Alright, shall not dwell further into it.
After school, i was supposed to meet cheryl, janice, christopher and melvin before going for Maths tuition at 330pm. Cheryl and Chris came to meet me first, then we settled at the void deck for lunch while waiting for melvin and janice to come. Everyone was silent and i could feel a mild essence of sadness and impatience building up within me. Wonder what had caused such feelings to grow within me at that juncture. Cheryl was rather moody judged by her facial expressions and sealed lips. That was a rare event as she was usually bubbly and vocal. Later, Chris chanted out words that said "I don't feel like goin for tuition." The reason he gave was that he had a GP essay and lots of Chem homework to complete. This further aggravated my impatience and sense of emptiness. Janice soon came from her Econs consultation and we had lunch. The time we waited for melvin to come was seemingly the most protracted 30-40 mins in my entire life. Melvin was notorious for his busy schedule as he is the president of the Geog Society. An impromptu meeting like this, did not astound us.
After tuition, I hailed for a cab with the intention of reaching home as fast as i could, so that i could start studying at 830pm. In the cab, the driver chatted with me as if I had known him for a long time. He practically told me his life story of how he became from an average income working person to a mere pauper where he had to wear the same clothes for about 3-4 years. It was a rather touching life experience and only then, did i realise that I was very fortunate to have a worry-free life in terms of expenses. I paid him 9 dollars before i dropped off at my apartment block. I really revere him for being able to slog seven days a week to support his family,and by just living on a basic salary of $2000.
Alright, time to study. Cya..
Mood: Sleepy
Tuesday, May 04, 2004
Where's My Mojo?
Today hasn't been a good day for me, not lately. Firstly, I woke up feeling like a drunkard suffering from a hangover the following day. My head was throbbing ceaselessly and i was in a groggy state. Perhaps it was due to the late knock out times i'd been experiencing for the past few days, or maybe, i was too accustomed to the what seemed timeless rest during the weekends? I really couldn't compel myself to wash up with my eyes dilated as per normal, as the light was too glaring for me to realise that i was actually living in reality and not in utopia. Just before i set off my journey to the torturous chamber of the S'pore's education system, i groped around for my 'daily necessity'-- handphone and wallet, and realised that i was actually 5 minutes later than usual.
In my dad's car, i was reminicing the events that had happened the previous schooling week and what gave me the drive to actually make the effort to go to school. Amidst the thoughts of familiar yet angsty faces of teachers and the multitudes of homework, I was forced to realise that friends were my motivation and driving force not just in school, but in my life ,as a whole, too.
Chapel wasn't as conducive for an eye-rest session as before, but nevertheless, i still managed to bob my head up and down due to the inborn sleeping spell within me. (who knows what caused it) Although overwhelmed by lethargy and restlessness, i was still, surprisingly, able to keep myself awake most of the time. Haha.. It was caused by the mild adrenaline rush after repeatedly hearing loud progressive footsteps heading down the aisle just beside my class's allocated area. "Mdm Tham!" i thought. Its not that i was "Tham-phobic" or anything, just felt a little bothered by her "like-to-poke-into-other-people's- business" attitude such that everything u do and wear will be scrutinised by her whenever she's around. Furthermore, i got into her bad books sometime ago by wearing wrong coloured shoes and having slightly tinted hair. Its not like i bother to change my shoes or anything but the immediate solution then was to avoid her presence as much as possible.
Erm.. tink ive typed too much.. got to go back to my books and dwell upon the phenomena of things in our life-- Physics. Yea.. you shld've guessed it.. k.. Cya for now..
Mood: Restless
Today hasn't been a good day for me, not lately. Firstly, I woke up feeling like a drunkard suffering from a hangover the following day. My head was throbbing ceaselessly and i was in a groggy state. Perhaps it was due to the late knock out times i'd been experiencing for the past few days, or maybe, i was too accustomed to the what seemed timeless rest during the weekends? I really couldn't compel myself to wash up with my eyes dilated as per normal, as the light was too glaring for me to realise that i was actually living in reality and not in utopia. Just before i set off my journey to the torturous chamber of the S'pore's education system, i groped around for my 'daily necessity'-- handphone and wallet, and realised that i was actually 5 minutes later than usual.
In my dad's car, i was reminicing the events that had happened the previous schooling week and what gave me the drive to actually make the effort to go to school. Amidst the thoughts of familiar yet angsty faces of teachers and the multitudes of homework, I was forced to realise that friends were my motivation and driving force not just in school, but in my life ,as a whole, too.
Chapel wasn't as conducive for an eye-rest session as before, but nevertheless, i still managed to bob my head up and down due to the inborn sleeping spell within me. (who knows what caused it) Although overwhelmed by lethargy and restlessness, i was still, surprisingly, able to keep myself awake most of the time. Haha.. It was caused by the mild adrenaline rush after repeatedly hearing loud progressive footsteps heading down the aisle just beside my class's allocated area. "Mdm Tham!" i thought. Its not that i was "Tham-phobic" or anything, just felt a little bothered by her "like-to-poke-into-other-people's- business" attitude such that everything u do and wear will be scrutinised by her whenever she's around. Furthermore, i got into her bad books sometime ago by wearing wrong coloured shoes and having slightly tinted hair. Its not like i bother to change my shoes or anything but the immediate solution then was to avoid her presence as much as possible.
Erm.. tink ive typed too much.. got to go back to my books and dwell upon the phenomena of things in our life-- Physics. Yea.. you shld've guessed it.. k.. Cya for now..
Mood: Restless
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